T-Minus 173hrs... and counting
This is it, the home stretch. 173hrs from now the big D (issertation) must be submitted. Only one guy on the course is done... damn Germans and their efficiency! The rest of us have left it to the last minute and looking back over the past 6 months I can only marvel at the amount of time wasted.
I coulda, shoulda, woulda, done it this way, that way, the other way but alas there is no time left to fret. In fact there is no time left to sit here and write this...
My group and I are working on a project due tomorrow. We are occupying several computers in the suite when we are disturbed by the arrival of engineers, "Make way, make way, we are doing presentations. Move to the other side of the room" big burly engineer guy bellowed.
Yeah, the side where there are no more computers, I muttered. He continued loudly, "Come on, everyone in line B1 gather up your things and bugger off!". Charming huh?
Well I could only laugh when this loud engineer guy was met with resounding silence upon looking for volunteers to start their all important presentations. In fact it transpired that no one was actually ready to do their presentation today except for one poor shy guy who was reluctant because he could hardly speak English and there were 50 other people in the room.
Then I hear that these unprepared sniveling engineers are
post graduate students, and here was me thinking that a group of unusually large kindergarten students had taken over all the computers.
Yay marketeers... Boo engineers
A Clockwork Orange - Anthony BurgessHaving seen the film a couple of times and being blown away by its outrageous use of violence juxtaposed with music, this book has been too long in the waiting. But alas it is now read and my only regret is that I didn't read it sooner, much sooner.
It is a clever portrait of the mindlessness of youth wherein we follow our Humble Narrator from the ages of 15 to 18. A period of intense growing up for most people this young delinquent is no different as he realises that his fetish for bloody violence and thieving is not socially acceptable.
The book is stunningly well written and employs throughout a youth language, invented by Burgess, by the name of
Nadsat. At first boggling, you soon become a malenky bit accustomed to it and by the final chapter you could govoreet like bezoomny with horrorshow slovos flowing from your litso.
Anyway don't make the mistake I made, if you ain't read it yet then you need to, soon, now... yesterday. A true classic.
Indecision is the key to flexibility
Having not posted for a wee while I thought I'd knock something up quick smart. Here are a few one liners that put a smile on my face and hopefully will do the same for you.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
Hard work has a future payoff. - Laziness pays off now.
Experience is what you get when you don't get what you want.
And finally...
This is as bad as it can get, but don't bet on it.
Not a gambling man, I went to the bookies yesterday. It was, after all, the Grand National and half the adult populatuion in the UK was expected to have a flutter on this 160 year old tradition. The bookies must have had a field day and when I was there I was witness to some unlikely gamblers, including one young cyclist who was locking her bike up outside and several college types lurking about at the back of the room a bit green around the gills.
With 40 horses running over a 4 and a half mile race anyone could win, there were a few favourites but even their odds were good at around 10/1, and a few outside chances with odds ranging from 33/1 to 100/1. After consulting the young guy behind the desk as to how to bet (I think I had more idea than he did) and him consulting the other guy behind the desk I was set to pick my nags.
This took all of 5 seconds, two off the top and one off the bottom, and I was set. I spread my stake of £10 pounds over my 3 runners Ad Hoc, Clan Royal and Hedgehunter then departed the bookies leaving the real gamblers to bet on all the other races of the day. In fact it wasn't untill several hours later, after not even watching the race, that I discover I had won,
Hedgehunter took it by several lengths!! WOO HOO!!
My £2.50 bet at 10/1 lined my pockets with a nice £25, and my £2.50 back too. So take away the other £7.50 I bet and a days profit of £17.50 which was dutifully spend on lunch with the significant other.
So, I was thinking maybe I'll go back next Saturday and win some more money seen as it's so easy, I figure if I had a stake of £1000 I could get £1750. Or I'm sure I could re-mortgage my house and get a stake of £10,000 then I could win some real money eh? Oh this gambling malarky is too easy...
Book Corner
Stiff - Mary RoachStiff: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers, to give it its full name, is a hilariously morbid autopsy of what could happen to your flesh and bones upon the departure of your soul. Mary Roach handles this unusual subject well and creates hilarity out of the interesting situations she found herself whilst conducting field research.
An intruiging subject delivered in humerous text makes this book unputdownable, you just don't know what you will find out next. From the dubious activities of Burke and Hare to learning of the new technology in body disposal, "tissue digestion", you get a chronological account of cadaver capers.
For those squeamish people you may wish to skip the lengthy discussion of research into the life expectancy of the decapitated human head (10-12 seconds), so how many people must have spend the final 10 seconds of their life closely examining wicker weaving?
Good book - gross but funny and educational, science is fun!
Bald and Grey
I am going grey. This fact is unstoppable. I could sit with my head over a sink once a month while someone masks my shame with chemicals, but I won't. I'm not ashamed, why should I be? It's all part of who I am, distinguished some would say and I will grow old gracefully.
There are some however who are not willing to accept their fate. This guy for instance at the bus stop yesterday was bald. It was obvious he was bald because he had no hair growing on the top of his head. I'm not talking about one of those wee skull cap jobs either, he was bald, with just those bits at the back and sides. He did however sport a
comb-over. A pathetic looking wispy flap of hair that he was almost permanently holding over his head. It was windy though so I thought well if your going to have a comb-over you must have to protect it in such conditions.
Eventually the bus came and we boarded. I sat down first and then my follically challanged friend sat in the seat in front of me, so now I had the chance to examine the scalp close up, if he would only stop touching it. This guy was clearly paranoid that his hair didn't look right, every 12 seconds his hand was back up to check that the wisp was in place, I suppose he figured that this made him look younger and more verile. It quickly became apparent that not only was this guy bald but also grey, his roots were showing through.
This guy was no spring
chicken either, late 40's anyway. I just thought well geez man, how long are you gonna keep this pretence up? Are you planning to be the only pensioner on the block with a dark full head of hair? Coz it aint working, you ain't fooling anyone, give up, go home and grow old.
